Three Types of Opinions
From one of my colleagues at Arbinger, I learned a most helpful way to think about my own views. The idea is that my views are of one of three types:- Things about which I have thoughts;
- Things about which I have opinions; or
- Things about with I have convictions.
Evaluating and Qualifying Our Own Thoughts
Here’s how my friend does it: In his communications, he is careful to categorize his views in one of the three ways listed above—as thoughts, opinions, or convictions. For example, sometimes he’ll say, “I have some thoughts about that, but not yet an opinion.” By this he means that he is aware that he hasn’t thought enough about the issue, or researched it enough, or received the training one would need, to have thoughts that could be considered reasoned. He realizes that his views in such cases are as likely to be driven by personal bias as anything else and therefore may not be reliable. He is humble enough to admit this to himself and others. Other times he’ll say, “I have an opinion about that, but not a conviction.” By this he means that although he has thought enough about the issue to have a reasoned opinion, he recognizes either that the matter is something about which one cannot be certain or that he still has gaps in his understanding and that his position might be incorrect. He is honest enough to be clear about that with others. On occasion, he’ll say that he has a conviction about a certain point. When he says this, I know that he believes he has put in sufficient effort to understand an issue and that he is highly confident he has it right and that his view is not being unduly driven by bias. Because he is self-aware and honest about his views, when he says he has a conviction, I take note. People can be mistaken, of course, even about their convictions. Nevertheless, I find my friend’s way of categorizing the relative strength of his views to be incredibly helpful, and I have enough experience with this approach to believe that speaking and listening in this way would have a significant impact on the health and effectiveness of our communications at work, at home, in our communities, and in our politics. For example, partners in a relationship who realize that many of the differences between them are merely differences of opinion are far less likely to get mired in conflict than are those who are convinced of the correctness of their own views. Similarly, business people who remain aware of their own ignorance will seek help and answers that opinion-bound people feel neither the desire nor need to find.Preventing Opinion Creep
When we are becoming “opinion creeps,” we tend to have convictions about many things and to have opinions about almost everything else. We blind ourselves to the enormity of our ignorance. How can we keep from doing this? How can we tell whether our opinions are creeping? We can check ourselves by paying attention to two things: how frequently we express a conviction, on the one hand, and how often we admit ignorance on the other. Too many convictions or too few realizations of ignorance may indicate that our opinions are creeping. Interestingly, the more we become aware of and honest about our own ignorance, the more seriously others will consider what we have to say. That might seem backwards. But if you think about it, it makes sense. After all, no one likes a creep.The post Why It’s Smart to Share Your Ignorance appeared first on Arbinger.
